Discovering the Wisdom of Mary Poppins: A Journey into Balanced Motherhood
Last night, while putting my children down for bedtime, they asked me to sing some songs from Mary Poppins. As we embarked on our usual routine of looking up the lyrics, singing the songs, and then watching the video clips, a profound realization struck me like a bolt of lightning. Mary Poppins isn't just a whimsical character from a beloved story; she's the embodiment of balanced motherhood and healthy attachment.
In that moment, as we sang along to "A Spoonful of Sugar" and "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious," it became clear to me that Mary Poppins teaches us something profound about parenting. She demonstrates that we can be both playful and hold the line, that we can show up when we are needed and know when our kids are okay. This revelation sparked a revolution within me, igniting a desire to explore and share the lessons we can glean from the magical world of Mary Poppins.
Embracing Dialectical Thinking in Parenthood:
In the realm of parenting, the concept of dialectical thinking, a cornerstone of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), holds profound significance. It reminds us that as human beings, we possess the remarkable capacity to hold two seemingly contradictory truths simultaneously. This unique ability, often referred to as the "both/and" principle, sets us apart from any other mammal on this planet.
As parents, we navigate a complex landscape where setting clear boundaries and expectations for our children coexists with our innate desire to be fun and playful caregivers. Like Mary Poppins, we embody this delicate balance, recognizing that both aspects are essential for fostering healthy development in our little ones.
Navigating the Paradox:
Acknowledging that setting boundaries while being playful isn't always a walk in the park is crucial. It requires constant negotiation, adaptation, and self-reflection. There are days when we may find ourselves leaning too heavily towards one end of the spectrum – perhaps becoming too rigid in our rules or too lax in our approach to discipline. However, it's in embracing the tension between these two truths that we find growth and transformation as parents.
In the classic and new versions of the movie, we witness poignant examples of this delicate balance. When Mary Poppins takes charge of the Banks children, she introduces a refreshing approach to chores and responsibilities. Instead of yelling out orders with rigidity and anger, she transforms mundane tasks like cleaning the nursery, running errands, and even taking medicine into delightful adventures. The joy and enthusiasm with which the children engage in these activities speak volumes about the impact of Mary's approach.
The Mary Poppins Approach:
Parenting like Mary Poppins is not just about creating a whimsical world of magic and adventure; it's about instilling a sense of healthy authority that transcends the dichotomy of permissiveness and authoritarianism. By setting clear boundaries and expectations with love and kindness, we foster an environment of mutual respect and understanding.
Closer Bonds, Healthier Dynamics:
Embracing the Mary Poppins approach to parenting not only brings us closer to our children but also cultivates more harmonious family dynamics. By embodying both firmness and playfulness, we create a space where our children feel seen, heard, and valued. This balanced approach builds trust and connection, laying the foundation for resilient and emotionally intelligent individuals.
The Role of Mary Poppins in Parenting:
In many ways, Mary Poppins serves as a catalyst for transformation in the lives of the Banks family. She arrives not only to care for the children but also to help the parents become better versions of themselves. In both the classic and sequal of the movie, we witness moments of revelation as Mr. and Mrs. Banks (and Michael in Mary Poppins Returns) rediscover the joy of parenthood and the importance of being present for their children. It is when they find this balance that Mary Poppins knows it is time for her to move on, confident that her work is done.
Practical Application: Making Everyday Tasks Fun
Some of the ways I've embraced Mary Poppins' playful spirit in parenting have been by infusing everyday tasks with joy and creativity. Rather than approaching mundane activities as chores, I've found ways to turn them into delightful experiences that bring the family together. Here are 2 ways that work for me:
When it comes to brushing teeth, we crank up Raffi's catchy "Brush Your Teeth" song and turn dental hygiene into a dance party. As we bop and sway to the music, the task of brushing teeth becomes a fun and interactive ritual that my children eagerly look forward to each day.
When my daughter struggle to sit still at the table during mealtime, I've discovered a playful solution to help her stay engaged with the family. Instead of giving up and letting her run around leading to chaos for my other daughter or enforcing strict rules, we play a game of "I Spy" for the remainder of the meal. This simple yet engaging activity not only makes the rest of the meal enjoyable for her but also fosters a sense of connection and togetherness as we share laughs and take turns guessing objects around the table.
By incorporating these playful strategies into our daily routine, I've found that even the most routine tasks can become opportunities for bonding and laughter. As Mary Poppins herself famously said, "In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun." And indeed, by infusing joy and creativity into our daily lives, we can transform even the simplest of tasks into moments of magic and connection with our children.
Conclusion:
In the world of parenthood, the principles of dialectical thinking remind us that we are capable of holding space for both structure and spontaneity, discipline and delight. Just as Mary Poppins effortlessly blends firmness with kindness and boundaries with playfulness, we too can navigate the beautiful complexity of raising children with grace and wisdom.
So, may you embrace the paradoxes of parenting, knowing that it is in embracing the tension between opposing truths that we discover the true magic of family life. As we channel our inner Mary Poppins, may you soar to new heights of connection, compassion, and joy in the extraordinary journey of raising your children.
A Reflection:
As you reflect on the profound lessons of Mary Poppins, I encourage you to revisit the movie and see what resonates with you. What will you do in your motherhood journey to embrace these teachings? Take a moment to ponder and envision the kind of parent you aspire to be, drawing inspiration from the timeless wisdom of everyone's favorite nanny.
Also posted as an Article on LinkedIn
